An Email to my congregation from April 26, 2020
You may have noted that I’m including two weeks in this email. This is not a permanent change, but is for this week only, as I’ll explain below.
I’ve written about the ways in which this period of social distancing has played out differently for different members of the community: those who are busier, those who have too much free time, those who are stressed and those who are enjoying a slower pace. I haven’t tended to talk about how I have been responding. This week, I will.
When we first began this, in the early part of March, I wanted to make sure that people felt I (and the Temple) was at least as present as we had been. So I started posting more to Facebook. I added a weekly Psalms study. I’ve tried to increase the frequency of phone contact with various folks, and to be faster about responding to emails. In between this, I also redesigned our Passover Seder plans, planned a Yom Hashoah service, etc.. We took the Rabin Religious School online, figuring out what each student and family needed and wanted.
All of this is to say, I’ve been busy, and running harder than is sustainable for me, and I became aware that my creativity and problem solving were/are not at a level I was happy about. I wasn’t doing the job as well as I wanted to. This all came to a head during one of my days off last week when I only worked 4 hours and counted that as a day off, and I couldn’t remember the last time I’d taken a real day off.
This is not to complain. I love to feel useful, needed, etc. But I also realized that I needed to top off my spiritual batteries. As I looked into the future at the events and conferences that normally restore me, it became obvious that there wouldn’t be any anytime soon. In fact, one of the first things cancelled was my rabbinical convention in mid-March which tends to be restorative for me.
So with permission from Debra, and a lot of urging from Eva, I am going to take a one week solo silent retreat from this Wednesday until the next. It will be a time of meditation and prayer. A week of being rather than doing (as we speak of Shabbat). I will not be checking email and I hope to not be checking the phone. Eva will be able to reach me in an emergency, as will Debra.
I feel so lucky to be with a congregation and leadership that values my my well-being. I truly appreciate this opportunity to recharge, to once more be able to think strategically rather than reactively. I am deeply grateful and aware of the blessing that I work for you.
And if this act of self-care on my part inspires some self-care in some of you, so much the better.